I just got off the phone with my uncle who lost his wife (my aunt and godmother) back in December.  Why is it so hard to work through this?  Why do I suppress the grief so much that when it breaks through it's so painful?  I know there are positive ways to work through loss and that he's made huge strides compared to where he could be now, which I have enormous respect for him considering they were married 63 years.

I feel paralyzed by so many things happening at once and not in a productive dealing way.  I want to run and hide to process all of this since obviously I haven't dealt with it when she died and a lot of other things went to hell within the past 6 months.  I want things to be better, please.