Most of the day was spent writing out Christmas cards. I've narrowed down my list from what it once was, or relatives have died, so I only have 23 ready to go. There's the usual hope you're happy and healthy phrase which took on a macabre tinge this year, and I settled on what an "interesting" year it's been since I didn't really feel comfortable starting with "WELL 2020 WAS QUITE THE SHITSHOW!!!!!" even though it's really what I meant.

If I'd planned ahead I could have ordered or made "You survived 2020, congratulations" keepsakes.

I actually meant the second part in the cards though, where 2021 seems to be far more promising. We have vaccines, and I trust Biden far more to shepherd the distribution chain since he knows how government and the military can augment each others' weaknesses. We'll have a coherent national strategy for the first time which might give the population, particularly in the Midwest, a fighting chance to keep cases and deaths at a lower level (we've missed the window of complete suppression). 

And with vaccination there's also a chance of getting a job again and interacting with the public. I hope there will be some form of career path but that's not even a dealbreaker; I have to start thinking about just making money for health insurance and other necessities once unemployment runs out. 

I'm trying not to obsess over it since I know a lot of job hunting is out of my hands, and I know how long job searches can be, but you have to start somewhere. I still have nightmares, but I don't think those are ever leaving me. Some things you just have to endure, and wish others better luck with their peace of mind and current situations.