Apart from my contentious phone call with my aunt (who will likely complain about it to my parents since I do not sugar coat the fact that she needs proper medical care, especially at her age (and random supplements will not fix it). I'm just tired. 

The job worked for the first year, but then they started relying on me more and more as they realized my skill set, and it hasn't stopped. I'm finding myself stressed with my family (my parents want to see me every weekend when I really just want to rest and decompress). I've told them no, but then they complain that they haven't seen me in a week. 

I'm not sure what to do. I've expressed to work that this is not sustainable. I've expressed to my parents the same, and with my aunt I can't even since I've suffered far worse medical crises and just had to deal with it to this day. I do not want to be in this place again where I have pressures from all sides because I can do it on a temporary basis.

I will not do it on a long-term basis. Not anymore since that was my last job, but I've pulled every string available at my job, and I do not have the ability to have every weekend with my parents since I need the recovery time from the weekend. My aunt is a whole other story, but while I do love my parents, why should they complain if it's not weekly? That is weird and only started after I lived there after leaving NYC. 

I wonder if it's some weird attachment from having my sister's failure to launch after her career (which was better paid than I'll ever be when she worked, but who knows now since she won't answer any questions about how she has any money now). I did the normal thing, had a major crisis, then COVID hit, but when I got a new job I moved out and have my own life such as it is. She...hasn't for 12 years. 

Maybe that's why they want to see me. I don't cause drama, I don't depend on them for anything although they insist in bringing over seltzer even though I've told them they don't have to, I can afford it and tote it upstairs myself, and often do so. I work in a normal job.

It's been a fucking mystery my whole life. Why is she given a pass? Why is she allowed to take innumerable years to "figure out her life" when she never goes anywhere but traveling to random countries without an actual job, just freelancing occasionally and never paying rent, groceries, electric or anything? It was the same when we were children, so the dynamic hasn't changed. I don't know. But I am angry about it since I owned my shit, moved out, and work with what I have.